The key element to a lasting relationship is communication. In order to truly understand what’s going on, a struggling couple needs relationship advice. Among the prime insights that they happen to gain from their life coach or counselor is concerning their communication issue. Several times, the problems they’re having arise because they stopped being genuine with one another at some point. This is worsened with lack of sharing. Also, just because a couple is brave enough to seek out counseling doesn’t mean they’re humble enough to take advice. Sadly, some couples don’t ever get past this stubbornness.
Couples forget that they got married so they could build each other up, not fight for themselves. Nobody is perfect and reaching this harmony is only feasible with the aid of efficient communication. When the partners are on the same page about their relationship, it becomes less complicated to solve conflicts and abandon grudges once such problems start to bother the smooth flow of the relationship. The growing need for marriage counseling is indicative of this widespread inconsideration for other’s feelings.
The wedding vows the couple made to each other sum up exactly what they aren’t doing for each other anymore, and, ironically, the couple is still wondering why they’re are in counseling. Many people fail to recognize the seriousness of those vows and also the amount of deliberative effort it takes to maintain them. It would most likely also mean they’d be wise enough not to simply give the cold shoulder and still expect issues to change for the better.
To expect that everything will always be rosy is undoubtedly an unpractical approach. You can’t just expect the other individual to not have difficulties when entering a relationship. Particular strengths and weaknesses are part of the package once you choose to be with a person. In doing so, you’ll find it is less complicated to talk about the relationship’s difficulties.
The professionals will tell any couple that the only factor more crucial than sharing your feelings is listening to your partner’s. You won’t truly trust anybody till you truly feel like they’re listening to you. All in all, it is every individual person’s total responsibility to take all this to heart and put it to use.
Wedding is one of the most enjoyable but also one of the most agonizing experiences that folks bear. It carries with it the scent of romance and eternal delight, but often you get a pack of thorns instead.
How do you Guarantee Your Wedding Is a Bed of Roses and not Thorns?
One of the main ingredients that a contented marriage wishes is an eagerness to reach a compromise. But that is much more difficult than it seems. Everybody will agree that they have to compromise, but what occurs when the problem’s not an easy and tiny one? What then? Who Compromises first? I am sure you have to have announced to oneself at 1 time or another that enough is sufficient. You will not be the patsy. You are an independent person and your other half has crossed the line. Maybe.
Maybe your relationship has died and you are just starting to realize it. Maybe your sensibilities are more keen than romantic. Maybe you now don’t love her.
Stop being a fool!
What if I was to tell you that the answer to your marital struggle isn’t divorce. Am I nutty?
Look around. How many divorces do you know? Plenty. Me too. But are they actually happier off?
What’s the first thing that a divorced person does? He goes out and starts looking for partners.
Isn’t that bizarre? No. You are saying that everybody needs somebody to love. Maybe. I say they had that somebody and they just let them go. So please stop being foolish.
Why not tackle your issues with an easy suggestion? A Game.
Games as a Peace Maker :
Playing brings out the kid in us and causes us to express more than we usually would. We also release pent up frustration and let go of mental thorns in our outbursts of joy and pain as we win or lose. Games unite folk together and so I recommend playing together but if you wish one can play against the other. The game turns into a battle but only this time, after its over, you may both feel refreshed from losing all that bottled up discomfort and fury.
Games to choose From :
Try picking games that the two of you like or at the very least rather active ones. You might even play hide and seek in the house or something else. If you do like playing cards, pick a game which does not go on for long and which needs a little thinking like hearts, poker, bridge or rummy. Keep score and determine before hand that the loser has to do something for the winner. Chores isn’t a prize for the winner! If you lose you have got to do something that that the other person wants for themselves like give them their favorite massage or cook them their favorite meal.
Games are a welcome ambrosia to love and will excite you as a couple to ignore all of your irritations and angriness and deal only with the good. The annoyance and irritations will not magically disappear, but now you can deal with them together quietly and in a happy state of mind.
What is Middle life in relationship to who I am? Is it a physical, mental, emotional or spiritual revelation? It may very well be all.
I do not know the day or time it occurred but I had gained insight of what it is to live inside my own skin. This physical part that attracts people and things into my space. The visual appearance that puts people at ease or makes them turn and walk away. The part that so many women and men pay to alter, through lifting and tucking to pretend that along with their new found wisdom they also have found their youth. That mid life reflection in the mirror that you avoid until the day reality sets in and you start yielding to these new needs, wants and desires.
The need to get connected to yourself becomes a priority. There is a connection between Relationships and Body. The held together self starts falling apart and you have no understanding of how to put those pieces back the way they were. You actually don’t want things the way they were. The desire for change gets overwhelming. You find that you have now created a new mission and the journey or the next chapter in your life begins.
The list begins by asking yourself what you want . Find yourself a great looking blank page book that represents you. Start to write all your ideas, dreams and desires in this book as carrying everything around in your head can become overwhelming. The more you write the more you allow your brain to dig out what lies beneath that first layer. You may want a different look or need to present yourself differently.
You desire to change your actions when others ask for your time. You may want to travel across the country or start a new job. The items on the list can start simple and work their way into higher level changes.
Time for yourself to uncover the person that exists in your body. Take the opportunity and evaluate each area of your life from career to friendships. Check out what’s in your mental and physical closets and the “stuff” your clinging to. Your fear and thinking distortions need to be swept and dusted out of this picture. You deserve to express in truthful ways that don’t hurt yourself, others or things. It’s actually time to really face the reflection looking back at you in the mirror of the present moment.
This mid life moment is yours to dissect, evaluate and eliminate.
When you begin to see and feel the changes within yourself, the outward starts to reflect the same. The ease of being with yourself as well as others becomes noticeable. You attract new people, places and opportunities into your life minus the need for acknowledgement from others. The feeling of honoring yourself is a very self rewarding feeling. Life’s not always about pleasing others. Welcome to mid life…the time between growing up and growing old.